I just made out with a guy for $7.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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