How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
