Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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