So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Randomize
