At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
We just shotgunned beers for America
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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