It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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