i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
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