My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
