Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
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