So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
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