Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
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It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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