I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
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Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
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My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
we should paint friendship bongs
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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