Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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