The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
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I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
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I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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