Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize