she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize