Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
