It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I'm always down for nudity.
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