glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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