I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Green mimosas i think yes
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize