Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
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