I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
