Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
