If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
