Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
