it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
