Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
