He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
