apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
