watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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