Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
She announced her abortion via fbk
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
