I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize