I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
