Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
