Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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