Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
