Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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