i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
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