How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
