Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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