Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
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Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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