Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
