i think my mom watched the whole time
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
