i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
We left the knife in your bed.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize