"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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