this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
