dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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