carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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