Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize