I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Enjoy the penises
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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