I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Well I just put wine in my tea
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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